climb up over the top
survey the state of the soul
you've got to find out for yourself
whether or not you're truly tryin
why not give it a shot
shake it, take control
and inevitably wind up
findin for yourself all the strengths
that you have inside of you
inspired by the words of mraz ....
HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!
Saturday, December 31, 2005
Monday, December 26, 2005
365 days to christmas
lunch at pauline and joe's ...
watched Lost dvd ...
left over spaghetti and slice of pumpkin pie for dinner ...
watched The Family Stone at the SO Galleria by myself ...
if i was back in high school and was asked to put together a 'how i spent my christmas day' essay, i would absolutely get a failing mark!
christmas day 2005 ... uneventful but just being able to relax, to breathe, and to go where the wind takes me made it special nonetheless.
watched Lost dvd ...
left over spaghetti and slice of pumpkin pie for dinner ...
watched The Family Stone at the SO Galleria by myself ...
if i was back in high school and was asked to put together a 'how i spent my christmas day' essay, i would absolutely get a failing mark!
christmas day 2005 ... uneventful but just being able to relax, to breathe, and to go where the wind takes me made it special nonetheless.
Friday, December 23, 2005
friday the 23rd
ok girls so check it ... i cruise controlled to work this morning! hahaha ... yes, cruise contol - 101 north - 70 miles per hour. pretty unusual for a friday morning drive on a southern california freeway but yah, i guess one of the lovely things about the holidays is that freeways miraculously open up. halleluyah! ALSO ... it was good to know that my cruise control actually STILL works. lol ... it's not very often do i get the chance to use it.
i am officially on christmas vacation!! funny tho that i have nothing planned for the next 4 days that i'm off work. it's one of those ocassions that i guess i'll just play things by ear, go where the wind takes me, or what not.
it's almost christmas. feels completely odd - this is my 5th christmas away from home.
i am officially on christmas vacation!! funny tho that i have nothing planned for the next 4 days that i'm off work. it's one of those ocassions that i guess i'll just play things by ear, go where the wind takes me, or what not.
it's almost christmas. feels completely odd - this is my 5th christmas away from home.
Tuesday, December 20, 2005
week 51 2005 ...
mr. weatherman said it will be 72-74 degrees on christmas weekend. that's so weird! i just might have to turn on my AC on christmas day!
in other news ...
i feel completely lost using a mac. it's quite a challenge. annoying and disappointing at times coz i couldn't find my way around it. for sure tho somehow i'll get the hang of it. i love how the laptop is so small now. that in itself is a major adjustment switching from a 15 inch pc. it's all good. i'm up for the challenge.
hmm, it's a little sad to realize that i don't have any gifts to open on christmas day.
i wonder whose christmas dinner i'll be crashing this year ...
in other news ...
i feel completely lost using a mac. it's quite a challenge. annoying and disappointing at times coz i couldn't find my way around it. for sure tho somehow i'll get the hang of it. i love how the laptop is so small now. that in itself is a major adjustment switching from a 15 inch pc. it's all good. i'm up for the challenge.
hmm, it's a little sad to realize that i don't have any gifts to open on christmas day.
i wonder whose christmas dinner i'll be crashing this year ...
Monday, December 19, 2005
Sunday, December 11, 2005
holiday party ... minus '+1'
last night, i trekked over to simi valley for the company's holiday party at the Ronald Reagan Presidential Museum. i have to admit, the venue was very impressive. i got the chance to go inside Air Force One and although it was a 1971 and less hi-tech version of the aircraft we saw in the harrison ford movie, it was still very interesting. more over, it was almost an out of body experience to be dining under this imposing white aircraft.
the night unfolded with endless drinks, a nice dinner and an awesome dessert table. i had fun in spite of the fact that i shared the dinner table with five couples. yeh, it's one of those times that i question myself - where the hell is my '+1'? or will i ever have a '+1'?? i sipped on my cranberry juice laced heavily with absolut vodka as i ponder the thought.
a few drinks later, i realized that i don't need a '+1' to enjoy the party. i was cool by myself. i know for sure that i can enjoy life even if i have to face it by myself. it's sad most of the time yes, specially when i look around the dinner table and i see five pairs of faces beaming with happiness. i look away but only to see more of them happy couples. i manage a faint smile. i am happy.
as i trekked back to sherman oaks with a slight buzz in my head, i remind myself that happiness is not solely a product of a '+1'. i can live a normal single life and be happy, content and comfortable. i have a whole lot of other things that i am be thankful for. it shouldn't take a '+1' to complete my life equation.
i am single and i am proud of it - that in itself is a major '+'...
dear santa ...
singing to the tune of "white christmas"
i'm dreaming of a 12-inch powerbook
just like the ones at the apple store
where the aluminum alloy glisten
and to itunes i listen
to feel this hot mac on my lap
i'm dreaming of a 12-inch powerbook
with every blog entry i write
may your days be merry and light
and may this powerbook be mine
i'm dreaming of a 12-inch powerbook
just like the ones at the apple store
where the aluminum alloy glisten
and to itunes i listen
to feel this hot mac on my lap
i'm dreaming of a 12-inch powerbook
with every blog entry i write
may your days be merry and light
and may this powerbook be mine
Saturday, December 10, 2005
Monday, December 05, 2005
Christmas in Hell
check out Christmas in Hell by Michael Lent. now available on Amazon (Barnes and Noble will be coming soon). The book won't hit book store shelves until after the holidays but is currently available on Amazon and several other online venues.
and dont' forget to check the website - www.christmasinhell.com
ok peeps, go click on the link and order a copy of the book. it's the perfect holiday gift for your spouse, gf/bf, ex-gf/ex-bf. ex-ex-gf/ex-ex-bf (if you're still friends with them), relative, co-worker, neighbor, enemy or your landlady.
and i wonder .... what actually goes on in hell on christmas day? i doubt it if it's a holiday for them too. do they sulk all day coz the rest of the world is celebrating the birth of jesus christ? do they walk around and pretend that it is NOT the 25th of december? they probably celebrate it by turning up the heat or adding more wood to the fire. ehh i dunno. and i don't intend to find answers to my questions anytime soon. teehee .....
and dont' forget to check the website - www.christmasinhell.com
ok peeps, go click on the link and order a copy of the book. it's the perfect holiday gift for your spouse, gf/bf, ex-gf/ex-bf. ex-ex-gf/ex-ex-bf (if you're still friends with them), relative, co-worker, neighbor, enemy or your landlady.
and i wonder .... what actually goes on in hell on christmas day? i doubt it if it's a holiday for them too. do they sulk all day coz the rest of the world is celebrating the birth of jesus christ? do they walk around and pretend that it is NOT the 25th of december? they probably celebrate it by turning up the heat or adding more wood to the fire. ehh i dunno. and i don't intend to find answers to my questions anytime soon. teehee .....
Sunday, December 04, 2005
holiday ramblings
so it's been a month since i was last on here. amazing how time flies and more amazing is the fact that small things, piled on top of each other, can completely sidetrack a person from his normal routine.
i'm still reeling from recent events concerning my dad. he has been in poor health the past few weeks. i'm torn between the states of helplessness and hopelessness. i want to see him but i can't. i want to be with him but i can't. certain situations restrict me from seeing him and i begin to question myself - am i cut for this? a million "why's" has been running through my head. the more i try to look for answers, the more questions surface. it's been difficult to maintain normalcy, painful at times. i deny it but i know my mom and my older brother and sisters are right when they say that HERE is where dad wants me to be. this is what he planned for me. so i struggle to stay strong at the same time try to find answers to my questions. i hope and pray that an opportunity to see him again will be eventually become a reality.
thanksgiving day came and went. it's my 5th time to celebrate this holiday that i hardly understand but hell, it was a 4 day weekend so i might as well enjoy it. destination: las vegas. gooble and liquor up seems to be the theme of this holiday resulting to an uneasy feeling of bloatedness and dehydration by day 4. despite the 10 hour drive back to LA, it was overall a great weekend. las vegas is always fascinating, it's always alive. top that with an awesome set of friends, las vegas is one desert i'll gladly be stuck in.
oh let us back track to the monday before thanksgiving day. i went to supercuts in sherman oaks to get a buzz cut. note that i don't usually go to supercuts. i go to a stylist to cut my hair but since i wanted a buzz cut, i figure i'll save some moolah if i go to a cheaper salon instead of my $55-per-cut stylist (hell, if i had a clipper i can do it myself). so i sat there almost tearfully watching the girl clipper off my hair when this man dressed in all black and ski mask walks in announcing 'nobody moves' and 'you get on the floor'. to everyone's horror, this man was robbing supercuts at 7:30pm in a the middle of rather busy sherman oaks intersection! and to make it worse, he had a gun. i sat there and watched the scene thru the mirror. the man stood about 5 feet from my chair and he was continuously swinging around his gun and a couple of time it came really close to my head. i felt the blood drain from my face and i was nauseous. i knew for certain that he was gonna ask for my wallet and my razr phone coz i sat really close to him. at the back of my head, i was ready to give it if he asks but after getting the cash from the register, he took off. everybody was safe thankfully. we called 911 and 15 minutes later (took the cops that long) i was being questioned by an officer. i was a witness to a crime! ugh. the image of that man pretty stuck in my head for a couple of days. that night as i lay in bed i tried to process the whole experience. lesson learned - never go back to supercuts. yeh i did save a few bucks but for a few minutes i totally compromised my safety and my life. i didn't sleep very well that night.
i am back at the corporate office in westlake after a brief stint in simi valley handling purchasing and products. as much as i wanted to stay in simi, i wasn't really given much of a choice. i was rather upset about the whole thing. it certainly isn't a sign of growth going back to the same department i've been working in for the past 3 years. i felt a certain degree of embarassment the day i came back to corporate. i felt like i was demoted in some way although i know i was really not. i couldn't express an honest response to the "welcome back's" that i got all day. it was difficult to even acknowledge with a smile. i was frustrated. but being the eternal optimist that i am, i look at the bright side - at least i have a job in one the biggest advertising and marketing company in the US. i know for a fact that not a lot of people are the given the chance so i'm thankful.
i recently bought a book called 'a beginners guide to web design'. i've been wanting to learn web design for the longest time and even planned on going back to school for it. due to financial restrictions, those plans has been sitting in the back burner for quite some time. recently though i've realized that i should take the initial step - self study. 'study' being the operative word. i'm taking the bulls by the horn and trying to get really into it while my motivation is still in full gear. it's good to learn new things and i welcome the knowledge.
christmas is around the corner and a new year is upon us. the holiday season is always a challenge for me. this season brings me a certain level of depression, of homesickness. it's feels odd to celebrate christmas when you're away from home. it's almost an irony to its entire meaning. like my past birthdays, i try to find a reason to celebrate. and like the past 4 years, i bet going to church alone on christmas day will be a extremely painful. it's always sad to find myself amidst groups of families or close friends celebrating the true meaning of christmas day. i remain hopeful. i'm sure my
turn will soon come.
no day but today ....
i'm still reeling from recent events concerning my dad. he has been in poor health the past few weeks. i'm torn between the states of helplessness and hopelessness. i want to see him but i can't. i want to be with him but i can't. certain situations restrict me from seeing him and i begin to question myself - am i cut for this? a million "why's" has been running through my head. the more i try to look for answers, the more questions surface. it's been difficult to maintain normalcy, painful at times. i deny it but i know my mom and my older brother and sisters are right when they say that HERE is where dad wants me to be. this is what he planned for me. so i struggle to stay strong at the same time try to find answers to my questions. i hope and pray that an opportunity to see him again will be eventually become a reality.
thanksgiving day came and went. it's my 5th time to celebrate this holiday that i hardly understand but hell, it was a 4 day weekend so i might as well enjoy it. destination: las vegas. gooble and liquor up seems to be the theme of this holiday resulting to an uneasy feeling of bloatedness and dehydration by day 4. despite the 10 hour drive back to LA, it was overall a great weekend. las vegas is always fascinating, it's always alive. top that with an awesome set of friends, las vegas is one desert i'll gladly be stuck in.
oh let us back track to the monday before thanksgiving day. i went to supercuts in sherman oaks to get a buzz cut. note that i don't usually go to supercuts. i go to a stylist to cut my hair but since i wanted a buzz cut, i figure i'll save some moolah if i go to a cheaper salon instead of my $55-per-cut stylist (hell, if i had a clipper i can do it myself). so i sat there almost tearfully watching the girl clipper off my hair when this man dressed in all black and ski mask walks in announcing 'nobody moves' and 'you get on the floor'. to everyone's horror, this man was robbing supercuts at 7:30pm in a the middle of rather busy sherman oaks intersection! and to make it worse, he had a gun. i sat there and watched the scene thru the mirror. the man stood about 5 feet from my chair and he was continuously swinging around his gun and a couple of time it came really close to my head. i felt the blood drain from my face and i was nauseous. i knew for certain that he was gonna ask for my wallet and my razr phone coz i sat really close to him. at the back of my head, i was ready to give it if he asks but after getting the cash from the register, he took off. everybody was safe thankfully. we called 911 and 15 minutes later (took the cops that long) i was being questioned by an officer. i was a witness to a crime! ugh. the image of that man pretty stuck in my head for a couple of days. that night as i lay in bed i tried to process the whole experience. lesson learned - never go back to supercuts. yeh i did save a few bucks but for a few minutes i totally compromised my safety and my life. i didn't sleep very well that night.
i am back at the corporate office in westlake after a brief stint in simi valley handling purchasing and products. as much as i wanted to stay in simi, i wasn't really given much of a choice. i was rather upset about the whole thing. it certainly isn't a sign of growth going back to the same department i've been working in for the past 3 years. i felt a certain degree of embarassment the day i came back to corporate. i felt like i was demoted in some way although i know i was really not. i couldn't express an honest response to the "welcome back's" that i got all day. it was difficult to even acknowledge with a smile. i was frustrated. but being the eternal optimist that i am, i look at the bright side - at least i have a job in one the biggest advertising and marketing company in the US. i know for a fact that not a lot of people are the given the chance so i'm thankful.
i recently bought a book called 'a beginners guide to web design'. i've been wanting to learn web design for the longest time and even planned on going back to school for it. due to financial restrictions, those plans has been sitting in the back burner for quite some time. recently though i've realized that i should take the initial step - self study. 'study' being the operative word. i'm taking the bulls by the horn and trying to get really into it while my motivation is still in full gear. it's good to learn new things and i welcome the knowledge.
christmas is around the corner and a new year is upon us. the holiday season is always a challenge for me. this season brings me a certain level of depression, of homesickness. it's feels odd to celebrate christmas when you're away from home. it's almost an irony to its entire meaning. like my past birthdays, i try to find a reason to celebrate. and like the past 4 years, i bet going to church alone on christmas day will be a extremely painful. it's always sad to find myself amidst groups of families or close friends celebrating the true meaning of christmas day. i remain hopeful. i'm sure my
turn will soon come.
no day but today ....
Friday, November 04, 2005
california highway patrol
fate is trying to be funny. and i'm not laughing ...
i got pulled over yesterday morning on my way to work - going 82 mph on the 118 where there the maximum speed limit was 65. it's the first time i was pulled over so i had no idea how to handle the situation. the sudden rush of panic was awful. i tried to get myself out of getting a ticket by telling the truth - that i was running late for work which i really was. bottomline, i got a speeding ticket. and that weighed down heavily in my head for the rest of the day. i didn't want no speeding ticket considering how whacked my financial situation is right now. why oh why did this happen to me?? talk about wrong timing. i'm anxious to find out how much i have to pay. at least 200 bucks i've been told by friends/co-workers - oye! and on top of that, i have to go to court and go to driving school to off set the record otherwise it will affect my insurance. this is all bullshit!!! no holiday shopping for me!
in other news ...
weekend finally ... i'm off to watch mraz again on sunday. yeh, i saw him perform last saturday at the joint in vegas and i'm going again this sunday this time at the wiltern in LA. i'm mraz-merized what can i say? like my friend lesley once said, mraz is like the the male india arie. his songs, both fast and slow, are meaningful. it has essence. pure talent. and he has a wicked sense of humor that will send you rolling to the floor.
other than that, nothing else exciting is going on. nothing really to call home about.
i wanna win the lotto jackpot - $192,000,000
i got pulled over yesterday morning on my way to work - going 82 mph on the 118 where there the maximum speed limit was 65. it's the first time i was pulled over so i had no idea how to handle the situation. the sudden rush of panic was awful. i tried to get myself out of getting a ticket by telling the truth - that i was running late for work which i really was. bottomline, i got a speeding ticket. and that weighed down heavily in my head for the rest of the day. i didn't want no speeding ticket considering how whacked my financial situation is right now. why oh why did this happen to me?? talk about wrong timing. i'm anxious to find out how much i have to pay. at least 200 bucks i've been told by friends/co-workers - oye! and on top of that, i have to go to court and go to driving school to off set the record otherwise it will affect my insurance. this is all bullshit!!! no holiday shopping for me!
in other news ...
weekend finally ... i'm off to watch mraz again on sunday. yeh, i saw him perform last saturday at the joint in vegas and i'm going again this sunday this time at the wiltern in LA. i'm mraz-merized what can i say? like my friend lesley once said, mraz is like the the male india arie. his songs, both fast and slow, are meaningful. it has essence. pure talent. and he has a wicked sense of humor that will send you rolling to the floor.
other than that, nothing else exciting is going on. nothing really to call home about.
i wanna win the lotto jackpot - $192,000,000
Thursday, October 27, 2005
hump day updates - 2
i know!!! one day delayed and im sorry. lol .. i had a crazy day at work yesterday and i had dinner plans last night.
* end of the month bullshit here at work is driving me up the wall! i want it over! i need a force field.
* i saw melody lacayanga at the dance studio i go to last monday night. she's soo cute and diminutive. i wanna marry her.
* The Amazing Race was fun! non-elimination round so the pink Godlewski sisters were saved.
* off to vegas this weekend to see jason mraz play at The Joint at the Hard Rock Hotel. good times! kinda scared about the drive though coz it's halloween weekend and im sure a lot of peeps are trekking out to the desert.
* speaking of halloween, i'm still undecided what i will be this year.
* it's been rainy and cold the past few days - a sign that winter is just around the corner. time to take out those sweater, coats, scarves and beanies. cold season in southern california doesn't last very long though and thank god we don't have to deal with snow since my tolerance for cold weather is pretty low.
* imma try making pork sinigang tonight. i really like it maasim! (making asim face) and i like mashing the gabi with the rice then pour sour broth over it. pass me the patis!
* it's sorta my policy to learn something new every day and today i learned that the english term for gabi is taro root.
* The Tourettes Cowboy - a must see for the silly peeps like me.
* i badly need to get new headphones for my ipod. my right earpiece conked out. i dunno but listening to music with one earpiece doesn't feel right.
* end of the month bullshit here at work is driving me up the wall! i want it over! i need a force field.
* i saw melody lacayanga at the dance studio i go to last monday night. she's soo cute and diminutive. i wanna marry her.
* The Amazing Race was fun! non-elimination round so the pink Godlewski sisters were saved.
* off to vegas this weekend to see jason mraz play at The Joint at the Hard Rock Hotel. good times! kinda scared about the drive though coz it's halloween weekend and im sure a lot of peeps are trekking out to the desert.
* speaking of halloween, i'm still undecided what i will be this year.
* it's been rainy and cold the past few days - a sign that winter is just around the corner. time to take out those sweater, coats, scarves and beanies. cold season in southern california doesn't last very long though and thank god we don't have to deal with snow since my tolerance for cold weather is pretty low.
* imma try making pork sinigang tonight. i really like it maasim! (making asim face) and i like mashing the gabi with the rice then pour sour broth over it. pass me the patis!
* it's sorta my policy to learn something new every day and today i learned that the english term for gabi is taro root.
* The Tourettes Cowboy - a must see for the silly peeps like me.
* i badly need to get new headphones for my ipod. my right earpiece conked out. i dunno but listening to music with one earpiece doesn't feel right.
Monday, October 24, 2005
it's really pointless
top 10 things that make alex happy ...
10. home cooked chicken adobo over a plate of steamy white rice...
9. a kick-ass routine at dance class...
8. an acoustic Mraz concert...
7. long weekends consisting of trips to the beach or a road trip to Santa Barbara or San Diego...
6. endless afternoon naps...
5. ipoding at work...
4. fresh contact lens are almost orgasmic...
3. lunch breaks by the lagoon...
2. trip to a city/state i haven't seen before...
1. someone special who'll make an extra effort to make me happy when all else fails...
10. home cooked chicken adobo over a plate of steamy white rice...
9. a kick-ass routine at dance class...
8. an acoustic Mraz concert...
7. long weekends consisting of trips to the beach or a road trip to Santa Barbara or San Diego...
6. endless afternoon naps...
5. ipoding at work...
4. fresh contact lens are almost orgasmic...
3. lunch breaks by the lagoon...
2. trip to a city/state i haven't seen before...
1. someone special who'll make an extra effort to make me happy when all else fails...
alex the chef
my latest culinary accomplishment - beef with mushrooms and kaldereta! lmao ... damn, it feels good to actually know how to cook something. i'm slowly graduating from eternal sandwiches, tv dinners and microwaveable meals. it's awesome!
and even though the kaldereta took me two hours to prepare, it was worth every minute! the end product almost brought me to tears because it reminded me of home. it was a lucky first try i have to admit. i got the exact taste how mama makes it (unlike my first try with adobo which was only half-way decent). and after two hours of cooking it, i finished my meal in just 20 minutes. is it just me or does one really eat faster when they are all alone?? sadness...
so my next mission is pork sinigang which i heard is uber easy to make - even easier than beef steak. i'm not a big pork-y oink-y fan but i might as well tryit and add to my roster of culinary achievements. oooh it just hit me - shrimp sinigang! lol...
and even though the kaldereta took me two hours to prepare, it was worth every minute! the end product almost brought me to tears because it reminded me of home. it was a lucky first try i have to admit. i got the exact taste how mama makes it (unlike my first try with adobo which was only half-way decent). and after two hours of cooking it, i finished my meal in just 20 minutes. is it just me or does one really eat faster when they are all alone?? sadness...
so my next mission is pork sinigang which i heard is uber easy to make - even easier than beef steak. i'm not a big pork-y oink-y fan but i might as well tryit and add to my roster of culinary achievements. oooh it just hit me - shrimp sinigang! lol...
Wednesday, October 19, 2005
hump day updates
ok ... every wednesday starting today, imma try doing a weekly-update-whats-goin-on-with-my-life-random-shoutouts-i-speak-my-mind-blah-blah-i'm-a-dork kinda post ...
* san francisco trip last weekend. happy to see my step-lola. pig out on caldereta and rice. ulk!
* hang out with my high school friend Mei on sunday afternoon. window shopping in downtown san fran. stroll on market street. movie at metreon. dinner at Cheesecake Factory which sits on the rooftop of the Macy’s Building in the heart of Union Square. sigh, a pretty autumn day in san fran!
* thanks for a storm named Wilma, i had the most horrifying flight ever! 30 minutes of turbulence while i watched lighting and rain thru the airplane window. i seriously thought that was it - the end, kaput, goodbye, adios, sayonara. i held on to my armrest like i would hold on to my dear life. i said a prayer and made a note to my family and friends just in case i die inside this crappy piece of flying metal called Southwest.
* ugly shoes and i talked last night. pleh! i can see where this "relationship" is going. "call you in a few days." makes me shudder every time!
* my YM buddy lesley is in a flash training in anaheim today. ugh, it's almost impossible to survive a work day without her!!
* from KGB (10/18) "Hi alex how are u. What u dont like to talk to me any more? No call, i see ur friends out, but your not there. What is all this about. I think i saw u on friday, maybe. U look hot, if it was not u well u looked hot anyway. I think ur hair is longer maybe. Well any way myy weekend was ok, just chilled out and saw a movie. I heard u were in S.F. to see family. Ill call u tonight. chow."
* i freakin missed Amazing Race Family Edition last night. grrrr ....
* i am very close to maxing out one of my credit cards! *shock*
* i discovered a Big Lots close to work - 3.5 miles away only!
* billie, a very good college friend of mine is coming to LA. wow! i think it's been about 5 years since i last saw her. can't wait!
* dance class tonight .. weee!!!!
* my next culinary project - beef with mushrooms.
* it's 3:56pm. an hour and a half to go! i'm clockwatchin.
* san francisco trip last weekend. happy to see my step-lola. pig out on caldereta and rice. ulk!
* hang out with my high school friend Mei on sunday afternoon. window shopping in downtown san fran. stroll on market street. movie at metreon. dinner at Cheesecake Factory which sits on the rooftop of the Macy’s Building in the heart of Union Square. sigh, a pretty autumn day in san fran!
* thanks for a storm named Wilma, i had the most horrifying flight ever! 30 minutes of turbulence while i watched lighting and rain thru the airplane window. i seriously thought that was it - the end, kaput, goodbye, adios, sayonara. i held on to my armrest like i would hold on to my dear life. i said a prayer and made a note to my family and friends just in case i die inside this crappy piece of flying metal called Southwest.
* ugly shoes and i talked last night. pleh! i can see where this "relationship" is going. "call you in a few days." makes me shudder every time!
* my YM buddy lesley is in a flash training in anaheim today. ugh, it's almost impossible to survive a work day without her!!
* from KGB (10/18) "Hi alex how are u. What u dont like to talk to me any more? No call, i see ur friends out, but your not there. What is all this about. I think i saw u on friday, maybe. U look hot, if it was not u well u looked hot anyway. I think ur hair is longer maybe. Well any way myy weekend was ok, just chilled out and saw a movie. I heard u were in S.F. to see family. Ill call u tonight. chow."
* i freakin missed Amazing Race Family Edition last night. grrrr ....
* i am very close to maxing out one of my credit cards! *shock*
* i discovered a Big Lots close to work - 3.5 miles away only!
* billie, a very good college friend of mine is coming to LA. wow! i think it's been about 5 years since i last saw her. can't wait!
* dance class tonight .. weee!!!!
* my next culinary project - beef with mushrooms.
* it's 3:56pm. an hour and a half to go! i'm clockwatchin.
Thursday, October 13, 2005
denial
a routine trip to K-mart turned out to be a wake-up call.i almost flipped when i walked into a section of the store laid out with fake christmas trees, beaming santas, and endless rows of holiday decors. i yelled to myself - 'already??! fuck me, i ain't ready'.
halloween isn't even over yet. for a second, i was tempted to talk to the manager to ease my panic attack. i wanted tell him that this isn't right. after a few seconds of deep breathing, i realized that it is already october and indeed, the holidays is just around the corner. it pretty much goes downhill after halloween. holiday songs will be playing on the radio, holiday decors everywhere you turn, red/green/gold ornaments etc etc! and slowly i will drift into my annual holiday depression. for me, the holidays mean 'a complicated level of homesickness'.
hohoho ... with a frown.
Thursday, October 06, 2005
=(
Cold, cold water surrounds me now
And all I've got is your hand
Lord, can you hear me now?
Lord, can you hear me now?
Lord, can you hear me now?
Or am I lost?
(from Damien Rice's Cold Water)
And all I've got is your hand
Lord, can you hear me now?
Lord, can you hear me now?
Lord, can you hear me now?
Or am I lost?
(from Damien Rice's Cold Water)
Tuesday, October 04, 2005
pinoy beef steak
yum yum for my tum tum!!!sunday night i was bored out of my wits when suddenly i remembered the beef steak recipe my sister gave me over the phone just a few nights ago. i rushed to Pavillions at the top of my street, got the ingredients and 30 minutes later i was enjoying a plateful of rice and my own home-made beef steak. it wasn't difficult to make it. and i realized what a dork i was for not trying it sooner.
and i am oh so proud of myself. hehe ... it wasn't as good like my yaya back home would cook it but mine turned out ok for a first-time try. i was so happy with my beef steak that i was tempted to gobble up the whole thing. lol ...
maybe this coming weekend i'll try adobo. it's gonna my new thing - i should learn how to make filipino dishes. i've been asked a million times before by my american friends if i know how to make chicken adobo or pansit (apparently, these are the most popular filipino dishes). i die of embarassment everytime i answer in the negative.
i should call home and tell mom about my recent culinary success. hahaha .. it's been 2 days and i'm still stoked over my beef steak. so stoked that i even had to make a special blog entry about it! good times!!
Wednesday, September 21, 2005
freeway snacking ...
so ok, this morning i woke up pretty late. thanks to a late night visitor. i was in a total rush to get out of the house, hop on my car and speed down the freeway. but viola! this lady on the left- most lane was chowing down on a burger or a bagel, god knows what, while going 50mph!!! given that almost everyone keeps a pretty busy lifestyle, i understand why some people have to "snack behind the wheel". but for crying out loud, get off the f-ng fast lane!!! and not because you have an extra few minutes to spare and enjoy breakfast on the freeway, it doesn't mean every one else does!!! how freakin inconsiderate. i was totally pissed i was tempted to rear-end her!
if you have to snack-behind-the-wheel, please remember:
1) AVOID THE FREEWAY ... please! take surface streets. everyone will be happy. you'll have a satisfying meal and everyone else will get to their destination on time .. and in one piece!
2) if for some reason, you find a sense of content by chomping on a breakfast burrito while driving on the freeway - USE THE RIGHT-MOST LANE! and i'm almost positive the members of the MealOnTheGo club will welcome you with open arms (and maybe a greasy handshake).
*breathe* sorry, i just had to vent.
if you have to snack-behind-the-wheel, please remember:
1) AVOID THE FREEWAY ... please! take surface streets. everyone will be happy. you'll have a satisfying meal and everyone else will get to their destination on time .. and in one piece!
2) if for some reason, you find a sense of content by chomping on a breakfast burrito while driving on the freeway - USE THE RIGHT-MOST LANE! and i'm almost positive the members of the MealOnTheGo club will welcome you with open arms (and maybe a greasy handshake).
*breathe* sorry, i just had to vent.
Saturday, September 17, 2005
flying solo ...
it's saturday night. it's 59 degrees out - nice and chilly.
i had a nice dinner consisting of salad, roasted chicken breast and rice with a glass of chilled pinot grigio.
ALONE ...
it feels nice in an odd way. i could get used to this. sometimes staying in is good for the body and mind. life do exist even in solitude. happiness and content abounds for those who search.
time for long hot shower then off to read a book. hop into bed by 11 and then i dream away...
i had a nice dinner consisting of salad, roasted chicken breast and rice with a glass of chilled pinot grigio.
ALONE ...
it feels nice in an odd way. i could get used to this. sometimes staying in is good for the body and mind. life do exist even in solitude. happiness and content abounds for those who search.
time for long hot shower then off to read a book. hop into bed by 11 and then i dream away...
Friday, September 16, 2005
top of my list
my favorite dance by far...
Blake McGrath and Melody Lacayanga - Lyrical
from So You Think You Can Dance (FOX 11)
Blake McGrath and Melody Lacayanga - Lyrical
from So You Think You Can Dance (FOX 11)
Wednesday, September 14, 2005
sigh ...
L: i know a song in tagalog
alex: oh yeh?
L: lapit manga kaybeegan at ma kanee kayo
L: ahoy medeladelung balita
L: galing sabayenko
L: nice koong imamahagi
L: amangabewndo
L: amanga pangayarin nagaganap salupong... pinagnako
alex: haha... wicked funny!
alex: oh yeh?
L: lapit manga kaybeegan at ma kanee kayo
L: ahoy medeladelung balita
L: galing sabayenko
L: nice koong imamahagi
L: amangabewndo
L: amanga pangayarin nagaganap salupong... pinagnako
alex: haha... wicked funny!
Tuesday, September 13, 2005
My Quit ... weee!
Quit 253 days. Cigarettes NOT smoked: 2532. $442.75 and 19 days, 8 hours of your life saved!
Monday, September 12, 2005
Saturday, September 10, 2005
weekend blahs
i knew it! the symptoms were obvious - scratchy throat, sneezing, watery eyes, sore joints. i woke up this morning with a fever and yes, i am very upset! God knows i can't afford to get sick now. and i'm not exactly the expert when it comes to being sick and taking care of myself. being the youngest in my family, i've got so used to being taken care of whenever i fall sick as a little kid. reality check - i'm now a 28 year old adult living on my own and there's no one else to take care of me but ME!
the more sorry part is i had laundry and cleaning to do today. i had a huge pile of dirty laundry and a tall pile of used dishes that's been screaming for attention. my apartment is a big mess it's not even funny anymore!!! bottomline, despite my need to relax and try to get better i had to get my sorry ass out of bed and start working around the house. did i mention anything about my bathroom yet? ugh! major ugh! cleaning that one up would have to wait!
i napped pretty much the rest of the day after laundry and dishes were taken care of. i wanted to get out and do something. it was a perfect day for a stroll down ventura blvd but i knew it would be wise to just stay in and rest. besides, i have to be out tonight for a friend's pre-birthday weekend celebration. yeh, just what i needed - more alcohol to kill my immune system. sure dehydrate me some more and i'll render myself clinically dead by end of the evening. ehhh, it's all cool. my friend's birthday celebration is the perfect excuse to be out and about, to see and be seen! (just wishing i won't bump into people i don't really care for!)
it's dinner time and i haven't had a single bite all day!
the more sorry part is i had laundry and cleaning to do today. i had a huge pile of dirty laundry and a tall pile of used dishes that's been screaming for attention. my apartment is a big mess it's not even funny anymore!!! bottomline, despite my need to relax and try to get better i had to get my sorry ass out of bed and start working around the house. did i mention anything about my bathroom yet? ugh! major ugh! cleaning that one up would have to wait!
i napped pretty much the rest of the day after laundry and dishes were taken care of. i wanted to get out and do something. it was a perfect day for a stroll down ventura blvd but i knew it would be wise to just stay in and rest. besides, i have to be out tonight for a friend's pre-birthday weekend celebration. yeh, just what i needed - more alcohol to kill my immune system. sure dehydrate me some more and i'll render myself clinically dead by end of the evening. ehhh, it's all cool. my friend's birthday celebration is the perfect excuse to be out and about, to see and be seen! (just wishing i won't bump into people i don't really care for!)
it's dinner time and i haven't had a single bite all day!
weee!
Summer of 2005!Pre-drinking at Eric's place before hitting the Sunset Strip.
From top L - R: Nina, Girlie, Raffy, Eric, Alex, Eliza
From bottom L - R: Kettle One Vodka, Doritos, Cranberry Juice
vodka shots anyone?
Friday, September 09, 2005
classic
May 22, 1966. This picture was taken 39 years ago at my parent's wedding at Santa Cruz church in Binondo, Manila.I came across this photo during my recent visit to my second-degree aunt in Long Beach (she's the young lady on the left side of the picture). When i saw it i was in awe! First, because i haven't seen a picture of my parents as a young couple ever since i moved to LA. And second, it's amazing how a copy of this picture has survived over the years.
I was tempted to steal it really but i had second thoughts. Stealing this picture is like stealing a piece of antique - it's old, faded, hardly pretty but nevertheless precious and priceless!
Thursday, September 08, 2005
YM 9/8/2005 5:20pm
alex: im happy right now. there may be something that can make me happier, but i'm in no rush. i'm sure that something will eventually come along.
cm: That's a good philosophy. Pretty much the one that I have.
alex: like my dancing, i want to live life full out.
alex: regardless if it's a life with somebody or a life on my own.
alex: and with that i bid you goodnight.
cm: That's a good philosophy. Pretty much the one that I have.
alex: like my dancing, i want to live life full out.
alex: regardless if it's a life with somebody or a life on my own.
alex: and with that i bid you goodnight.
sense of normalcy
i was back in dance class last night after a two week absence. it felt awesome. also, it gave me a sense of normalcy after two weeks of playing host/tour-guide. i had two sets of guests visit me recently and my daily routine was totally thrown off. i'm not in any way complaining coz the past two weeks has been the best so far this year...
cousin mei ... my dear "little sister" and i reunited after 4 long years. funny how seeing her at the airport brought me to tears. it felt surreal to actually see her and hold her. spending time with her gave me a sense of "being home". she bridged the gap between my two homes - LA and
nina and girlie ... two friends of mine from college came out to LA for Labor Day weekend. it was a long weekend filled with good times and lol, alcohol! what amazes is me the fact that i've known these girls for about 9 years now and through the years we all managed to be friends. we may have grown up differently in some ways but when we're together, it all comes back. it feels like we're back in college - wandering free spirits in search of fun and maybe a sense of purpose. being with nina and girlie is one good reality check - that true friends are rare and i'm lucky i have them.
mei, nina and girlie - three girls i spent the last 2 weeks with reminded me to stay grounded. their presence made realize what i was in the past and in a lot of ways help me understand what i am today.
it's bittersweet when the day comes that it's time for guests to leave. every single time i would wonder and ask myself - when will we see each other again. only time can tell, i guess. as long as we stay in touch, special bond with relatives and friends will remain strong. it may be a lot of work but for sure, it's all worth the effort.
Wednesday, July 27, 2005
birthday blues
it's the 27th of july 2005 ... it's my 28th birthday ...
let me start my blogging by posting my horoscope for today ...
"Today your mind could be filled with magnificent dreams, alex. You might have a vision of an object you would like to create. Maybe you will be thinking about changes you can make to your home. It could be time to reinvent your home space. Consider making changes that will brighten up the energy in your house. It might be good to do some painting, some wallpapering, or some minor repairs to spruce things up a bit."
i'm not crazy about astrology, please don't get me wrong. i just couldn't find any other non-sense i can put up as initial post. lol ...
i rant and i rave and i ramble a lot ... this is my blog ... and it shows ...
let me start my blogging by posting my horoscope for today ...
"Today your mind could be filled with magnificent dreams, alex. You might have a vision of an object you would like to create. Maybe you will be thinking about changes you can make to your home. It could be time to reinvent your home space. Consider making changes that will brighten up the energy in your house. It might be good to do some painting, some wallpapering, or some minor repairs to spruce things up a bit."
i'm not crazy about astrology, please don't get me wrong. i just couldn't find any other non-sense i can put up as initial post. lol ...
i rant and i rave and i ramble a lot ... this is my blog ... and it shows ...
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